November.

November is my favorite month.
leaves quickly changing colors and falling all over the ground.
the air is cooler and i can finally wear scarves!
i feel like i sleep better too.

and can we please talk about sitting by a fire?!
the temperatures are usually just right for them.
so far this year i have warmed my hands by a fire twice this month.
i'm trying to plan more of those soon.

my favorite holiday [Thanksgiving :)] is at the end of the month.
i enjoy it most because it's about food and fellowship.
and i am thankful for the extra time i get to spend with my family.
and hopefully catch up with some old friends.

of course, maybe it's my favorite because it's also my birthday month :)
i will turn 36 this year.
the more time i spend in my 30's the more i know these are some of my best years.
i am growing older and, hopefully, wiser.

i already feel like November has flown by.
so i will try to savor these last 10 days as much as i possibly can.
i am headed to the upstate this weekend.
i can't wait to bundle up and collect some beautifully colored leaves.

Hello.

Hello. 

it's me. 

i was wondering

if after all these months you'd like to read to go over everything

that has been happening in my life.

                                                               Hello. 

can you hear me?

i'm in Carolina dreaming about who i used to be when I was younger & naive.

Hello.

it really has been too long since i last wrote.

so much has happened in the last 365 days.

i am not the same person i was a year ago.

so Hello from the other side.

i must have cried out a thousand times.

and the Lord heard me!

and He answered my prayers!

Hello from the outside

at least i can say that i've tried

to forgive & trust in His best.

because He sees what i cannot see.

and He knows what i cannot know.

Hello.

450.

it has now been over a year since i last partook of the greasy goodness we call fast food :)  unbelievable. i am so thankful for such a dramatic change in what i choose to eat. and what a difference it has made in the way i feel, both physically and emotionally.

eating healthy everyday is a choice, and i don’t always choose wisely. i do know that removing this one temptation has helped tremendously.

again, i want to encourage all of my readers to choose to eat healthier. one of the hardest, yet most fulfilling ways, is to not eat fast food. your pants will get looser and your wallet will get fatter :)

three things i'm trying to quit...

      we all have things we struggle with, things we need to give up. i have more than these three things, for sure. these are just the ones that i know are most important for me to quit right now. 

i don't really put that many packets in my cup.

      1.  fake sugars. we’ve all heard the rumors that “they” tell about fake sugars: what it’s doing to your brain, how awful it is for you in the long run, etc. well living w/ diabetes can lead to using fake sugars instead of real sugar.

the one place i tend to use fake sugar a lot, or at all, is in my coffee.  even though i only drink decaf, I still drink a lot of coffee five days of the week.  at the end of each day i may have consumed between 10 to 15 packets of fake sugar. ridiculous. i know. this has been going on for about a year now, maybe longer.

so this week i decided to start backing off of them and now i’m down to 6-9 a day. of course, the end goal of this is to not use them anymore. my goal for next week is 4-6. slowly but surely :)

what is sleep?

2. staying up late. i can’t remember a time when i didn’t enjoy staying up late. i always feel like I need to be the last one asleep in the house. i’d like to blame this on (but cannot) years of slumber parties where the first girl who fell asleep always had the misfortune of ending up w/ whip cream in her face, or some other absurd prank young girls like to play on one another. i never wanted to be that girl. and I never was :)

fast forward some years and here i am. always hopeful of going to sleep before the 12 o’clock hour, and pretty much failing to meet that curfew every night. i get this second wind and then it’s all over. and of course i play on my phone for a good 30 minutes each night once i get in bed. dropping it on my face at least once during that time.

i am usually running off of six to six and a half hours each night, excluding friday nights if i am fortunate enough to sleep in the next day. and just like fake sugars, not getting enough sleep is so bad for your health, in so many way and on so  many levels.

if i do happen to get seven to eight hours of sleep a night, i feel so good and so happy about it and think “i should do this every night!” i’m just not consistent in this area of my life. and I NEED to be, as it leads to my third thing that i need to quit…

this is my actual alarm :)

3. showing up late to places. including, but certainly not limited to: work, dinner, coffee dates or working out w/ a friend. i know that it is so selfish and disrespectful. i am fortunate to be surrounded by super loving and gracious friends, family, bosses and coworkers.

from time to time, people get upset w/ me about said tardiness. some people even pick on me about it. i can say that i try my best to get places on time, but if i was really trying my best then this wouldn’t be on the list, now would it?

oddly enough, when i do show up somewhere early I feel so awkard, like “what do i do w/ this time?” it’s as if i have no idea where to stand or sit or what to do w/ myself. weird you say? yes, I agree :) however, if it is a serious situation, such as being in a wedding, i will not be late. that would be the worst offense.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………...

friends, hold me accountable, please. ask me how i’m doing with these three things when you see me or talk to me. i hope to tell you by the end of this summer that i have conquered all three :)

wishing you all a safe memorial day weekend!

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………...

365.

ONE YEAR WITHOUT FAST FOOD :)

can you believe it? i can't! this is such an exciting goal to have reached. it doesn't feel like it was a year ago. and now i'm here, on the other side. it feels so good. and thank you to everyone who has been so encouraging to me through this personal challenge.

some things i have learned over the last year about my previous relationship w/ fast food: 

1. i am no longer an emotional eater b/c what i would go to for comfort was fast food. no more! 

2. i don't have a desire to eat fast food. i actually think i would feel bad, emotionally, eating it again. (though i'm not ruling it out in the future, but i would like to go as long as possible w/out it.)

3. if i were to calculate the amount of money i have probably saved over the last year i think it would be somewhere around $500-$700. maybe even more. (that's ridiculous!)

4. i feel so much better, inside and out. i was eating so unhealthy three months prior to giving up fast food. it's really embarrassing how much of it i was consuming. 

some words of encouragement for anyone wanting to give up their fast food habit: 

-fast food is a convenient option when you are in a hurry, don't want to cook and are on the road. i get that. but it is not your only option. fruits and nuts are an easy snack to curb your hunger while on the road or while you wait for a meal to be prepared. you can choose to eat better.

-ask someone to take the challenge of not eating fast food w/ you. it's always helpful when you have someone else to walk through something w/ you, even as trivial as this may seem. accountability is so helpful. crucial even.

-take it one day at a time. i didn't begin w/ a year in mind. i just started out hoping to see that i would be able to go a long time choosing to eat healthier things. challenge yourself to a month. the first week was the hardest for me, but i did it. and so can you.

-telling people about what you are trying to achieve will help you. they will encourage you when you need it. they will help you. they will cheer you on as you reach for your goal.

may we all choose healthier options NOW.

you CAN do it!

juicing recap...

drum roll please ....................................................................

i lost 5 more pounds! that makes my grand total, after seven days of juicing, 12 pounds lost! woo hoo!

it's over. i can honestly say that it was one of the most challenging things i've ever done in my life. there were times i was not sure i could do it. but i'm glad i did it, and now i'm glad that it's over. i was ready for it to be over. i don't think i will ever do a seven day juicing cleanse again. i would do a one day or three day juicing cleanse though.

i still had good energy for two days after. the first day after was an experience. it was weird eating regular food again. and i ate really well, mainly whole fruits and veggies if what i was juicing. i don't think it mattered what i ate though, my body definitely had to adjust to solids again.

by day two of eating food again, it felt weird mentally to think about the fact that my body was no longer clean. i was putting things back in it that were good for me nutritionally and everything, but it wasn't going to be the same. that may sound strange. i know i will get over it. i'm happy to say that i am definitely more aware of what foods i need to eat to make myself feel the best and look my best. i'm hoping it is a routine that sticks and i will do my best to see that it does. i also need to remember to forgive myself if and when i give in. 

thank you to everyone who has stuck around to hear about my journey. thank you for all of the encouragement and love. thank you for the time you took to read my story. may you all have the discipline and courage to take your next step into a healthier life :)

day 7: juicing

on my final night of the juicing cleanse i got nine and a half hours of sleep. i had the day off and was able to sleep in so that was nice. i had more of a "brunch" juice since i slept late. it was weird thinking that i was making my final juices, and nice at the same time.

my final juice ingredients :)

in case you were wondering what the food cost has been for me over the last week, my total spent was $150. i still have some carrots, celery, a pineapple and some ginger left over. i plan on cooking the carrots tomorrow night for dinner. i will definitely eat the celery and pineapple, but i'm not sure what to use the rest of the ginger for yet. 

my friend lauren came over and i had her juice some carrots while i filmed it. i hope you enjoy seeing my juicer at work :) it's crazy how fast it juices them, right? also, i sound silly :)

tomorrow i will have my final weigh in and be able to finally eat solids again. i'll be sure to update you on my total weight loss and how i'm feeling after eating real food again.

come back tomorrow for my juicing challenge recap :)

day 6: juicing

i was only able to get six hours of sleep last night. really it was my own fault. i enjoy staying up late and on the weekends i feel more freedom to do so. however, i was not exhausted like i thought i would be. in fact i felt really good all day, but i was definitely tired by10:30 pm. i got my five juices in again today w/ lots and lots of water. 

the picture above is an example of juice that would technically equal three normal "meals" that you would eat. the juice that it makes is enough for my three "meals" and then i juice some more for "snack" juice.

today i played baseball w/ some friends and it was so much fun. other than that i have not gotten much exercise during my juicing cleanse. i have been doing squats and some crunches. i'm looking forward to a walk tomorrow and getting back in to my normal workout routine on tuesday.

can you believe i only have one more day left? i can't. i'm interested to see how i feel after incorporating whole foods again. i will be eating really healthy for the first three days. i will mainly be eating a lot of the foods i juiced, just whole now. it will be so nice to chew on something and hear that crunch sound again. i love things that crunch when you eat them :)

i just think the juice foam looks so pretty :)

i watched the football game last night at my bosses house w/ our youth group and i had some of the kids taste the juice i had made for dinner. and most of them loved it. one of them even said it tasted like fruit punch :)  

ONE MORE DAY! see y'all at the finish line :)

day 5: juicing

i got seven and a half hours of sleep last night. again i felt really good, but i also got in a two hour nap :)

due to that nap, i threw my juicing schedule off and only drank four juices. but i wasn't hungry and made sure to drink lots of water in between.

another yummy juice in the books! (not pictured: ginger & blueberries)

if you didn't notice the link in day 1 to the new juicer i chose, please scroll over the word Breville, click the it and you will be directed to the store where i purchased my new juicer. one of the main reasons why i chose that juicer is b/c the spout where you put the fruits and veggies in is so much bigger. and as i stated before, it's quieter and the clean up is so easy.

last night i bought some pears to put in my remaining juices. excited to try those. today i started saving the kale, spinach and carrot pulp from my juices. i plan on using them in some recipes on tuesday, which i will of course share w/ you all. 

here's the pulp!

there are only two more days left in my juicing challenge. i can't believe i'm almost there. i'm almost finished. it has surely been a challenge and also a learning experience. and so many people have been so encouraging to me about this process. thank you again if you were one of those who have spoken words of encouragement to me and if you have said a prayer for me during this time.

see y'all back here tomorrow :)

day 4: juicing

seven pounds people! 

that's how much weight i have lost after three full days of juicing. unbelievable. that brings me back up to 26 pounds total lost. what?! i know that there is a great possibility of gaining back some of the weight i lose from this juicing cleanse, but i'm excited to see how much more i lose by day 7. 

there is a lot going on in this juice and it was so yummy!

i got eight hours of sleep last night and i'm feeling great! i made another juice today that is so good. i'm halfway there and feel like i'm finally starting to enjoy the process. i'm still drinking five juices a day and alternating water in between each one.

i have decided that grapefruit is my favorite thing in a juice :)

if this juicing cleanse has taught me anything it's that i need to drink so much more water than i have been  drinking. now i love water, and besides decaf coffee that's usually all i drink, but it has become very clear to me that i need to be drinking more. it's good for your body for so many reasons.

see y'all again tomorrow :)

day 3: juicing

i can already tell my skin is looking different, like it has a glow to it or something. last night i only got six hours of sleep, and needless to say i was tired. i didn't feel exhausted though, i'm assuming juicing has helped w/ the lack of exhaustion.

i put my juice in this fun old glass oj bottle :)

i started my morning off w/ the rest of some yummy juice i had made the night before. i continued to alternate water w/ my juice. i made a gazpacho type juice to drink for "lunch" and a "snack." i was thinking it would be like cold soup or something. that was a huge mistake. it was not disgusting, but after three sips i knew i could not finish it all. i only drank 1/3 of the pitcher it made. i ended up drinking a lot of water while at work the reminder of the day. 

the best juice i've ever made :)

when i got home from work i immediately juiced something else that i knew would be yummy. and it was :) maybe the best juice i've ever made. what a relief! i was starting to get discouraged and now i know i can do it. i was really excited to be able to drink the rest of that juice for "breakfast."

tomorrow i will weigh in and see just exactly what this juicing cleanse is doing. see y'all then!

day 1: juicing

first things first - i bought a new juicer! my old one did a good job in the two years i've had it, but it was time for an upgrade. the new one is a beauty :) it does a great job at the actual juicing, keeping the waste of the fruit and veggies at a minimum, makes less noise, AND it is so easy to clean!

for the days following up to the juicing challenge i made sure to eat really well. i got lots of protein, fiber, fruits and veggies in my system. i worked out the day before as well. "they" say you are not supposed to work out a lot during a juicing cleanse b/c you won't have the energy for it. i plan on walking some later in the week though.

the night before the first day of juicing i got 9 hours of sleep. that is not normal for my life, but i want this juice cleanse to do what it does and a good night's rest is sure to help.

i started my day w/ 24 oz. of water, which i will alternate throughout the day between juices. i didn't actually have my first 24 oz. of "breakfast" juice until 11:30 am. on a typical day, i tend to either not eat breakfast or just something small, and drink coffee. and i always eat a late lunch. after the first juice i had another 24 oz. of water. i waited too late to drink my "lunch" juice, so i did get a little hungry around 3 pm, but drank the juice and did not feel hungry again. i followed that juice w/ more water. 

*juice for my breakfast, lunch and snack.* (ingredients: lemon, apples, cucumbers, spinach, romaine lettuce, tangerines, blueberries, celery, bell pepper, carrots & pomegranate.)

*juice pulp aka waste.*

around 4:30 pm i had another 24 0z. of juice and again followed that w/ water. (my apologies if you are already bored.) i left work around 6:45 pm and went home to juice my dinner :) followed by more water and then i had another "snack" juice around 10:30 pm.

*dinner juice consisted of these fruits and veggies.*
(not pictured: spinach, romaine lettuce, pomegranate, bell pepper and cucumbers.)

i had so much energy at the end of the day! it was kind of hard to wind down. i read a little and finally winded down around midnight. when i checked my blood sugar before bed it was in the range it needed to be and i was so happy to see that. i was concerned my blood sugar might drop so it was good to see that it was consistent w/ what it normally is.

a side note for any of you coffee lovers out there wondering if i felt sluggish w/out any - i've been drinking decaf since august. my doctor suggested i stop drinking caffeine after i went to see her for my weird heart palpitations. apparently those are normal for a lot of people, but she told me i could either take something for them or change things in my diet. i obviously chose to change things. within two days of not drinking caffeine the weird heart palpitations basically stopped. it is a rare occasion that i have them. and if i ever have any caffeine it's when i drink the occasional chai tea from my favorite local coffee shop, Lula's :)

see y'all tomorrow for day 2 of my juicing challenge.

                   

day 2: juicing

my first full night into the juicing challenge i got 7 hours of sleep. i thought for sure when i woke up i was going to be groggy, per usual, but in fact i was not. i felt really good and had a lot of energy during the day. 

i realized from day 1 that i needed to drink more juice throughout the day and not wait so long in between "meals." i did really well and alternated 24 oz. of water between each juice again. however, i did not pay close attention to what times during the day that i juiced. i was more concerned w/ trying to drink the juice five times a day. and i made sure to start my "breakfast" at 9:30 am. 

yummy juice for the latter part of day 2: carrots, cucumber, tangerines, strawberries, lime, celery, apple, tomato, pineapple and bell pepper. (not pictured: spinach & kale.)

food smells from today were extra strong. i wasn't even hungry all day, but i was wanting what i couldn't have. it is weird not eating solids. when i cook, i just throw things together most of the time. and that's exactly how i juice, which has worked for me so far.

i thought day two would be easier than day one for some reason. but it wasn't. as i said before, i wasn't hungry at all, which was great. however, by the end of the day i just wanted to chew something! i was honestly craving a hamburger :) before bed, i kept wondering if i had bitten off more than i could chew w/ this challenge. (pun intended) and i prayed that i would really crave the juice. my peeps have shown me so much love and have been so encouraging. i thank you immensely for it all. 

maybe i already started planning my first solid meals for when the 7 days are up :) a townhouse salad for lunch sounds about right, doesn't it? 

5 more days to go! see y'all tomorrow :)

a confession and a challenge.

i'm about to be really honest w/ you and put myself in a vulnerable position. i'm doing it b/c i think it's important, i want people to be more aware of their health, and i want to encourage someone else.

on july 26, 2013 i was diagnosed w/ type 2 diabetes.

(i went to my doctor the day before b/c i had been having some weird heart palpitations for the last several days and wanted to get them checked out. i had also been extremely tired recently and very thirsty, which i would later be reminded are symptoms of diabetes.)

my doctor's office called me and told me the news while i was at work. it came as a complete shock to me. (both of my parents have diabetes so i knew i had a chance of getting it, but i thought my chances were slim b/c i do not have a big sweet tooth, very rarely drink sugary drinks, etc.)

i immediately broke down in tears and left work early. i called my mom and texted a few close friends who i knew would pray for me. it's one of those things where i felt embarrassed and just knew that people could look at me and tell that something was different. i realize now how dramatic that sounds, but that is honestly the way i felt. i also knew i just needed to get through that day and i would be able to see more clearly.

i went back in to the doctor the next week to talk about medicine and what i needed to change in order to get my blood sugar down to the number range it should be in. one of my greatest fears in life is being dependent on medicine and i knew i wanted to do everything in my power to change what needed to be changed.

i started checking my blood sugar twice a day and taking a pill every morning. losing weight was next on my list. for two and a half years prior working out was more of a dream than an option, due to back issues that i have. i had recently gotten clearance from my chiropractor to exercise again. i was really excited and scared at the same time.

i joined a gym again, for the first time in four years, and began working out three to five times a week. i watched my sugar intake, which was making sure i didn't eat any sweets (unless sugar free - aka that fake sugar), yogurt and watching the sugars i ate in salad dressings, and other sauces, which if you know me then you know i love a sauce :) and i also limited my carb intake.

my blood sugar got down to the range it needed to be in (and has consistently stayed there) and the weight really seemed to just begin falling off. i've never known what that felt like. i lost 26 pounds in three months! when i went back to check in w/ my doctor about my progress she told me that i was a poster child for what people should do when they find out they have diabetes. i was so encouraged!

a fire had been lit under me. God used the horrible news of diabetes to kick start a healthier lifestyle for me. i had already stopped eating fast food five months prior and knew that God had put that change in to effect to make this one even easier now. i could see clearly. i could see the bigger picture.

my end goal is definitely to come off of the medicine and, God willing, erase the diabetes completely. it won't be easy and i'm not even sure it's entirely possible to wipe it out completely, but i want to do everything i can to try and make that happen.

healthy lunch option for me: lettuce & hummus "sandwich" w/ grapes :)

here's the latest: after losing that 26 pounds in the first three months i gained back 7 of it at the beginning of november, lost 5 of it again after a week of not eating any processed foods, but eventually gained that back. i have kept off the other 19, even through the holidays! unfortunately i have not lost any weight since then. and that is discouraging.

and here comes the challenge: juicing. i love to juice and have used it as a meal replacement several times before. one of my friends decided to juice this week for 5 days. and i thought it would be a great time to do it myself. but i will be doing a full week, 7 days. and i began today! i'm doing it in order to reset/cleanse my system and jump start my weight loss. (among other reasons.)

i'm sure this sounds absolutely crazy to some of you, and that's ok. if you would like to better understand why i'm doing what i'm doing and what juicing can do for your body, PLEASE go watch the documentary Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead. it's on Netflix and it's so good. you can also read more about it and the guy behind the documentary at www.fatsickandnearlydead.com

a previous juice spill :)

i will be blogging each day of my juicing cleanse to share how i'm feeling, what i'm drinking and answer any questions that y'all may have for me. thank you for taking the time to listen to me and i encourage you all to listen to your bodies when things don't seem quite right.


please click these links for even more information on juicing:
Joe Cross's 3-Day Weekend Juice Cleanse
How To Do A Juice CLeanse

300.

i'm almost at a year without fast food! (technically day 300 was on december 20th, but the holidays happened.) i'm so excited to almost have reached my goal of one year. and it didn't begin that way, to go an entire year, but i'm so glad it is going in that direction.

i doubt i will head out to a fast food restaurant on day 366 and order something i used to eat. i have enjoyed this healthier lifestyle and i really crave better things now. part of me thinks i will feel bad about eating fast food again, when or if it happens. but i don't see that as something awful. it was really a guilty pleasure, convenient and quick fix. it really is all about eating things that are better for you, even if that means taking the time to cook something healthy instead of instantly gratifying yourself w/ something that is bad for you.

so day 365 is in sight. the end of february will be a celebration for sure. what a goal to reach! 

thank you all again so much for all of the encouragement. you can do this too!

as we head in to 2014, what will your new goals be?

happy new year!

chicken bog.

remember that time i had three different kinds of chicken bog three days in a row?

let me explain.

friday: my across the street neighbors were selling chicken bog tickets a few weeks ago for a church fundraiser. church chicken bog is always the best. so of course i purchased a plate. there was chicken and sausage in it. 

just the way i like it :)

saturday: i went to a family reunion. there was no way i could have known what kind of food would be served. low and behold, chicken bog. however, this was not your average chicken bog. it had so many different kinds of meat in it. some of which i still don't think i know. i can tell you that there was chicken, sausage and deer meat in it for sure. it was the absolute best chicken bog i have ever tasted in my life.

sorry not sorry.

sunday: parents provided dinner for youth group sunday night. chicken bog, w/ just chicken (in case you were wondering). it was delicious. and the best green beans were served along side of it.

i only realize now how ridiculous chicken bog three days in a row sounds. 

and tomorrow night i'm going to the 15th annual oyster roast at the Florence Museum.

mmm mmm good :)

250.

it has now been 250 days since i last ate fast food :)

i am so close to a year!

at this point, it feels like i won't really ever want it again.

though recently i went into a wendy's w/ some people and got a salad, yet the smell of those fries made me want some.

of course i didn't get any.

and i just don't think they would taste the same.

i depended on fast food to fill this hunger void quickly which just equalled long term nastiness, but now i've replaced that void w/ things that are so much tastier and so much better for my body.

one of the best things about not eating fast food is feeling so much better and having more energy.

as much as i love fries i love chips, and now i replace them at lunch w/ either a salad, grapes or clementines (which i lovingly refer to as fruit crack!)

and at night when i'm craving something salty and crunchy i make popcorn w/ coconut oil. 

or i buy the plain kind from the store and put some lemon pepper seasoning on it. 

nothing.like.it.

when a year rolls around at the end of february 2014, i'm not so sure i'm just gonna run back to those golden arches.

i almost never want to have it again.

but ask me that in three days and i may say something different :)

to anyone who thinks they can't do this, let me be the first to tell you that you can! 

fast food is not what you need it's what you want, in that moment.

choosing healthier options will always be what you need and better for your body and your wallet in the long run.

it will be hard, but it will be worth it.

fall.

fall is my favorite time of year. specifically the month of november. it's the month of thanksgiving and my birthday, which equals lots of time with loved ones. it also means a lot more of baking treats for people will be happening.

cold weather is the best weather. you get to layer up, wear boots, jackets and scarves - one of my favorite accessories. 

soups and hot drinks are best when it's cold out. and you can always dream of seeing snow this time of year, as the weather gets colder. 

the leaves changing color are amazing. i find it hard not to stop and pick up each one i see. odds are, if you open up a book from the shelves in my house, leaves from previous seasons will be stuck in between the pages.

there is just something so magical about the fall. it always feels like anything is possible. i don't know why i think that way, i just do. maybe it's the hope of something new.

i love how we can see visible signs of the seasons changing. something we can't always see at first when it happens to us. we change and we grow. and if we are fortunate enough, we have God to guide us and teach us along the way.